Well, this was a fuckin’ disaster. We tried to actually enforce traditional wrestling rules, and the result was one of the worst shows we’ve ever had, and that was before we lost one of our top guys. I don;t know why you’d want to, but watch it below, before Twitch deletes it, or read about it. Fuck.
Watch Struggling With My Connection 2019 from Turrible666 on www.twitch.tvMATCH #1: The Uberklaw defeated Tyrannosaurus Plex in 21:09 with the Terrible Claw
Nerd Rating: ⭐⭐⭐ 1/2⭐
Klaw is on the way up, and T-Plex seems to be on the way down. When this company relaunched, I figured he’d be an unbeatable monster, and he looked like that for a while, but lately, not so much.
MATCH #2: Pitbull Van Scorpio defeated Gummo Nakamura with the Spiccoli Driver in 22:42
Nerd Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐ 1/2⭐
This was the only match of the night without weapon DQs or countouts, and look, it was the match of the night. Imagine that.
Watch (almost a) FIVE STAR MATCH: Wrestling Sleaze vs. Normal Sleaze from Turrible666 on www.twitch.tvMATCH #3: Hoda Duda-Day defeated Junior Grim in 16:00 by countout
Nerd Rating: ⭐⭐⭐ 1/2⭐
Fuckin’ countouts. Jesus. Hey, Hoda won, for a change, though.
MATCH #4: Uno Muerte DREW Trondheim Troy by double countout in 22:27
Nerd Rating: ⭐⭐
GOD FUCKING DAMN IT.
MATCH #5: The Rockin’ Rocksmen defeated Reverse Racism in 12:53 when Rocky hit Minh with a sit-out powerbomb
Nerd Rating: ⭐⭐ 1/2⭐
The Reverse-R’s have lost three straight, with two of those being to the Rockin’-Rs. Another “opposite trajectories” story here.
MATCH #6: Yumiko La Grange defeated Lorelei Grim by countout in 8:14
Nerd Rating:⭐⭐
In a normal situation, this could’ve been a titanic battle of irresistible forces and immovable objects, but nope, countout.
MATCH #7: Big Bird Machine defeated Peppy Wright with a rolling lariat in 10:23
Nerd Rating: ⭐⭐⭐
FUCK YOU, PEPPY. The Evil Agents interfered, and El Hijo Del Big Bird Machine ran in to help run them off. President Evil seems to be escalating tensions with both the Birds and the Think Tank, which seems unwise, and starting two separate, avoidable wars is an unprecedented act for an American President.
MATCH #8: Garfield Vanzetti defeated Skip Legday with a Special Tactical Maneuver (CRITICAL!) into a countout in 12:28
Nerd Rating: ⭐⭐ 1/2⭐
FUCK. FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUUUUUUUUUUCK. Fuck.
Next time, we’re going back to indy sleaze lawlessness. No more countouts. Jesus. Go away.