Tag Archives: lorelei grim

TALES OF THE INVISIBLE BACKSTAGE CAMERA: WAFFLE HOUSE AND ARBY’S

THE SCENE:  Backstage after the opening match of STRUGGLE Pro THE COOL ZONE #1, a freshly-defeated YUMIKO LA GRANGE  is not handling the loss well.   Despite the intervention of STRUGGLE Pro head booker UNCLE ABDUL, it can be safely said that she is absolutely losing her shit.

YUMIKO LA GRANGE;  What the fuck was that, anyway!?  Lorelei Grim is like a thousand fucking pounds!  She moves like a sloth!  How the fuck can you not duck that lariat!?

TOSHIYO NAKANO:  Please, Yumiko-san, I-I I try, but she just-

YLG:  Do not give me a fucking excuse!  DUCK! THE FUCKING! CLOTHESLINE!

UNCLE ABDUL:  For Christ’s sakes, Yumiko, just calm down!

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THE STRUGGLE SESSION! #1

This was a thing we used to do back when we still had TV, where we’d hype up the next show by getting the talent to stand in front of a big STRUGGLE logo backdrop thing (or a brick wall with an inexplicably-placed chain link fence in front of it, or just going to their home unannounced) and talk shit about each other. It did good business and looked good on TV, so when someone found the backdrop out back, (and cleaned the bird shit off of it) we decided to make a new edition of the the STRUGGLE Session for the upcoming SHELTER IN PLACE TOUR #4 show. Of course, as always, the camera that got used was the one that Buddy From the Ring Crew had put a big Post-It note on saying “BROKEN – DO NOT USE,” and since everyone here is an idiot, the footage ended up being a bunch of purple blobs. So as always, there’s nothing but a transcript we managed to put together. Anyway, I know the average wrestling fan can’t read, but maybe someone will get something out of what we salvaged – Abdul

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